A rush shipment of a series of fantastic new products has just arrived at the BiblePlaces.com International Distribution Center. All of these items are available for immediate shipment.
Bag of Rocks: Authentic specimens from a hill in Israel. You can plant these in your garden, and before you know it, your garden will be full of them.
Basket of Authentic Potsherds: Unwashed, unsorted. May include EB through Ottoman period artifacts. Your basket might contain an ostracon!
Biblical Archaeologist Swimsuit Calendar: Featuring 12 of the world’s most renowned excavators on exotic tells that they dig.
Packet of Mud: Wet soil possibly washed off by the blind man at the Pool of Siloam.
Ossuary: Inscriptions of famous biblical people added for an extra charge.
Private Lecture: A dramatic presentation for you and your friends by Charles Gadda on the true origin of the Dead Sea Scrolls and expert techniques on how to convince the world that you’re right.
“I Deny” T-Shirts: You fill-in-the-blank. Popular options include: the existence of the Jews in the Holy Land before 1948, David and Solomon, maximalism, minimalism, antiquities sales, the James Ossuary, Bible thumpers, Q, Ai, the “BAR crowd”, biblioblogs.
Tour Pass: Good for a one-day tour of the archaeological sites of the Gaza Strip, personally hosted by Khaled Mashaal and his friends.
The Truth About Archaeology DVD: Dozens of volunteers explain the realities of excavation, including stories of grime, sunstroke, hospitalization, and slavery-like conditions that they paid for.
Fibers from the rope around the high priest’s ankle.
Ashes from the destroyed city of Sodom. Well-preserved. From the Sodom of your choice.
Television Special, 60 Minutes (DVD): Breaking report that reveals how a Jewish temple never existed in Jerusalem. Features extensive research and interviews with
two three smart locals.
Postcards of Jerusalem: Only one dollah. The top one looks nice.
Payment may be made in darics, denarii, drachmas, or dileptons. All orders must be received not
later than 11:59 p.m., April 1st.